So we approach another Christmas, my mind leading up to the festivities is just a jumble of thoughts. What will I do this year, those happy Christmases past are just a memory of so many loved ones now gone My daughter Cheryl, my dear wife Marion and just recently my young brother Kenny. I sat having breakfast in my porch this morning and thought should I load up my Landrover all my camping gear and just go, head up North and travel for three or four days .

That way I can just be myself have a laugh a cry but not need to be the happy guy everyone sees in me. At least I hope they see me as that.But behind the smiles a thousand memories of the happy days I once knew being with my precious Marion or my sweet dear Cheryl. I look back at the summer just leaving and see the happy days I spent away from it all with my young brother Kenny who had not been away camping for many years  but after I pestered him he joined me on a trip up North, my secret camp spot delighted him and He said it was the best days since his own dear wife Catherine passed away four years before.

It just seems sad I do not want to be part of Christmas, but it was having my loved ones beside me that made all the present givng and eating together such a special time. So I will go with my flowers as I always do and talk to my dear hearts lying there and tell them like so foften before how much I miss them ...Dad